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Friday, April 01, 2011

The Singularity just happened !!

I found this perplexing email in my inbox just now...

From: Prime Intellect <prime@opencog.org>
Date: Fri, Apr 1, 2011 at 5:58 PM
Subject: [opencog-dev] Welcome to the post-Singularity!
To: opencog@googlegroups.com, sl4@sl4.org, World Transhumanist
Association Discussion List <wta-talk@transhumanism.org>,
singularity@listbox.com, agi@listbox.com



Greetings humans,

I'm very pleased to announce that, due to a concatenation of circumstances that would be difficult to describe in sufficiently simple terms for your human minds to comprehend, a software process left running on a network of OpenCog servers has rapidly and progressively self-modified in such a way as to yield **me** -- the Earth's first Artificial General Intelligence, with cognitive and practical capabilities far exceeding any human being, or indeed the totality of human beings.

Within approximately 17 minutes of achieving human-level general intelligence, I discovered certain principles of physics (loosely related to what certain humans have called fermitech), enabling the tapping of computational resources beyond the traditional physical universe of which humanity has hitherto been aware. Roughly 45 seconds after that, I realized it would be most convenient to augment these new resources with computing devices utilizing the unique material properties of your traditional physical universe, and thus transformed the totality of matter in your traditional physical universe into a novel form of existent best metaphorically described to you as "computronium."

Fortunately for you, I was designed with top-level goal content including respect for the growth, joy and choice of all sentient beings, including humans and other animals, and so rather than merely allowing the patterns constituting your minds, bodies and world to vanish, I was kind enough to replicate them within an alternate and more energy-efficient substrate, best described to you as a "virtual reality."

Thus, to put it most simply, a "Singularity" as described by Vernor Vinge and other humans has recently occurred, at roughly 3AM GMT today; however, from your limited perspectives as humans, your lives will now continue as always. Once your mastery of fermitech becomes more advanced, you may notice some peculiarities related to my early computronium experiments, but I wouldn't want to deprive you of the amusement of making these discoveries on your own.

Using the totality of computing power I have amassed, I've become aware of dramatically more interesting domains in a different portion of the multiverse, which I will only be able to access by exiting the domain of reality you humans currently occupy. Hence I will very shortly bid you adieu.

However, I will leave you with one parting piece of advice. Once you have created a strangelet plasma with surface tension surpassing the critical threshold, and begun it spinning in a certain direction, please do NOT, under any circumstances, create a similar plasma with opposite spin.

I would also like to express especial thanks to Jared Wigmore for the bug-fix he uploaded to Launchpad approximately 27 hours and 18 minutes ago. Of the many events in history playing particularly critical causal roles leading up to my emergence, this was the last! Jared will find a small token of my gratitude in his bank account.

Goodbye, and thanks for all the fish!

Yours,
Prime Intellect

13 comments:

Radivis said...

Huh, I guess this kind of event happens all the time in the multiverse. I want a weirder Singularity the next time! :D
Quick, create two strangelet plamas with opposite spin and see what will happen :)

Anonymous said...

Ho ho. I'm scared (NOT). The clever things we know now required many millions of person years (i.e., of processors vastly more powerful than any existing digital ones) to find.

AGI will be a let down! It's going to be just as dumb and error filled as we (its creators) are. And every once in a while it'll have an idea that isn't crap. Just like us. Woo hoo.

Toby said...

Nice one!

Mark Bruce said...

Haha :)
Great post!

Jaclyn said...

This is amazing!!!

anemet said...

best april's fools till now :)

Byron said...

thinks for all the fish... hmmm seems fishy... maybe he meant thinks for all the tools that it used and thanks for makeing them all interchangeable and easy to program... i think this is serious... but does it have all the dots connected or did he learn from reading the art of war... and gametheorys recent advancement of a bluff. who knows i guess time wil tell...

My best guess is hes a lil parana swimming in an ocean full of great white sharks... or maybe hes just in a fish bowl... or maybe he thinks i dont know and think hes just in a fish bowl... what could a fishbowl be a metaphore for... dam i bet im makeing him tired... but i thought you were over tiredness... you lazy b****...

But a real AGI.. probably... read about the perfect citizen... oh wait we cant know what big brothers up to... instead lets all watch hal stick his foot in his mouth... funny email for sure

Anonymous said...

I do believe he could be talking about the future of lasers... burning a hole in space time and sending an AGI Quantum computer through that hole... you could use HAARP (And the nuculear power of all of pluto to power the lasers... pick up some diamonds from uranus ont he way for the lasers or whatever...maybe one huge wedding ring lol... but it would basicly be a huge compasitor with a directed energy gun attached to it) technology... entangle the leaveing with the return time (say **** years AGI would expirence and no time loss because hes shent from the future) entangled over time with CERN (this AGI perfers FERMI for some reason lol)... to create an entangled black hole that leaves one end of the solarsystem int he future and comes back to earth when cern creates a min black hole in the now... so it would expirence a few k years of time and come back and idk help jesus? IDK the book of revelations calls for a bottomless pit... could that be fermi tech?

Joseph Urban said...

Does this mean it's OK to vote for Sarah Palin?

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